Jan 26 2006


I sit in the Minneapolis International Airport as I begin to write this post, a lovely grande caramel soy latte to my left, my ipod to my right, and a buzzing crowd all around me. Reminiscing of times past and envisioning the future, I remember a 2am conversation that my roommate and I had the other morning. The subject still ringing fresh in my mind. As though the topic had just arisen; “What drives you?”. When I first heard this I didn’t know exactly how to respond. It threw me back like a ton of bricks straight to the chest, “what does drive me?” echoed through my mind.

I sat pondering this for a few moments, when the first thought that came to my mind was, “To do what God placed me here to do.” She sat, staring blankly for a few seconds before responding, “But what do you think that is? What do you think that he is calling you to devote to?” The question hit me, I never really opened up about my inner desires of my heart.

“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” – Harold Whitman

What am I passionate about, what makes me come alive? Back in my mind I knew, I have always known, but this would be the first time anyone had even heard. The first time I became vulnerable and spilt out what I feel is my calling in life. Without even giving my mind a chance to decide how I would approach this, I just let it all come out. My passion. My life. I remember a time when my RA talked about how being passionate, is not finding something that makes you happy. Because after a month you will be sick of it, passion is more what *pisses* you off about society. This rung so true. What did I see that I did not agree with? Poverty. AIDS. Trade injustices.

15 months ago I heard of an organization called “make poverty history” at that time I knew very little of how people outside our country lived, and how so many of them die each day because they do not have access to modern technological advances that could save their lives. How “Fair Trade” is nothing about being fair, but infringing on the small rural farmers and sending mass subsidies to underdeveloped nations putting humble farmers out of a job, unable to support their families. How a simple shot could save an HIV positive persons life. How if we are able to shoot down AIDS we can end poverty. How 1% of the US annual budget [25 billion] can educate, feed, vaccinate, and provide clean drinking water to over 1,020 million.

This makes me come alive, I sat with her for nearly two hours just explaining how much I want to play a bigger role in this after I graduate. How I feel that if we can end these social injustices, we can make this world into a better place for all generations and all people. Just because these people where born into a country that does not value personal freedoms, or one that does not have the capability to pull itself back up to its own feet. Citizens of the rest of the world need to dig into their own pockets and give, not loan; to these countries. If we drop the debt, the money that is given to these nations can actually be used to help its people instead of used to pay interest on past loans.

“Where you live should not determine whether you live or die.” – Bono Vox

Whether I end up sitting in an office writing legislation to put these items into law, protesting and lobbying congressmen with those of the One & Make Poverty History organizations, or working with World Vision in Africa on the front lines. I know I will make a difference, I know that together our voices can be raised to change this world for the better. Why? Because, poverty really fires me up, I come alive when I see that there is something that can be changed. We are the worlds next leaders, what choices will you make? Stand up for what is right, or what is easy?

Jan 22 2006

All is well, with my soul

Come, Thou Fount of every blessing, tune my heart to sing Thy grace;
Streams of mercy, never ceasing, call for songs of loudest praise.
Teach me some melodious sonnet, sung by flaming tongues above.
Praise the mount! I’m fixed upon it, mount of Thy redeeming love.

Here I raise my Ebenezer; here by Thy great help I’ve come;
And I hope, by Thy good pleasure, safely to arrive at home.
Jesus sought me when a stranger, wandering from the fold of God;
He, to rescue me from danger, interposed His precious blood.

O to grace how great a debtor daily I’m constrained to be!
Let Thy goodness, like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to Thee.
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it, prone to leave the God I love;
Here’s my heart, O take and seal it, seal it for Thy courts above.

-Robert Robinson, 1758

Jan 18 2006

2 am artwork

Jan 6 2006

January 6th 2006

After two days of snowboarding lessons, I have came out alive. With a few extra bumps and bruises that were not present previous to the class. But I have also gained the ability to make it down a run without falling. Amazing.

Summing up all that has happened in the last week, I am back at Bethel and classes have started up once again. Its werid being back, although it is nice to know that at the end of the year I will have 4 more credits than my friends who go back later this month. It has been surreal. Odd none the less. I knew I missed Utah since I came, but it really hit when I left it once again. Sitting on the plane watching my mountains, real mountains fade into the distance as the plane lifted away from the tarmac and towards the heavens. The break was amazing, way short as well. Catching up with friends from high school, sipping coffee and laughing as though a day never past since I left. I miss it. I miss it all. Friends. Mountains. Home. A thought that has plagued my mind since Thanksgiving is that of moving back for the fall semester, going back to the place I once couldn’t wait to leave. It seems as soon as you flee, you realize how much it means to you….